Kakashi's Lament
by Chris Hill
Summary: Kakashi will regret having the most unpredictable person in Konoha on his team. Poor him.
1. Killing is so easy

"Wait, you want us to come at you with the intent to kill?"

'Well, that idea goes out the window.' Kakashi thought to himself. He had expected Sakura to say that, not Naruto.

"Correct."

"Then I want that in writing, one copy for each us, and another copy for yourself before we continue." Naruto stated beligerantly.

Kakashi's lone eye blinked. This was not going how he expected at all. "Well…"

"Actually, make that five copies. I want one delivered and approved by the Old Man before we begin." Naruto nodded, mostly to himself.

"Naruto, I don't think you need this…" Kakashi started to say.

Naruto stared at him, remembering things from years ago. "Yes I do 'Dog Face'. I ain't getting killed by others if something goes wrong and you can't stop a killing blow."

Ah. Now Kakashi knew what was bothering Naruto. "Fine. I will draw it up."

Naruto grinned, "I'll also deliver it. No way I'm going to let something interfere if you mess up."

Sasuke was getting annoyed at the blond, as was Sakura, but he did have a point. If this teacher was not good enough, and they injured, or killed him, then they would be in trouble. "Just get this over with, Dobe."

"Ok. Ok. Geeez Teme, you're anxious for blood." Naruto replied.

It was afternoon by the time Naruto arrived back with the approval from the Hokage. Unfortunately for Kakashi's plans, he'd had to feed the two the bento's he was keeping back. His carefully planned day was already down the toilet, and he was trying to think up of a plan to replace the 'lunch option' of the test.

Finally ready, Kakashi said, "Begin!"

As Sasuke and Sakura jumped away, Naruto shot his hands forward towards Kakashi and a loud bang was heard. The two other Genin turned back, just in time to see Kakashi crumble to the ground. Naruto grabbed both bells and said, "It's amazing what you can do with a pipe, an explosive tag, and some stones, isn't it?"


	2. Hospital stays are so boring

By popular request, part two of Kakashi's Lament.

----

"I refuse to take that...that...person!"

Hatake Kakashi was currently resting in a bed. A Hospital bed to be specific as he had ended up here after the disastrous showing during his testing of a prospective genin team. It had been three days, and he was currently fine, but doctors, being who and what they were, wanted to keep him under observation for a few more days.

Then again, he was the first jonin instructor to almost end up dead giving a test to just released academy students. His showing had gathered him both a new name, and an unfortunate reputation. Now, aside from the name 'Copy Cat Kakashi', 'Son of the White Fang', and 'Forever Late Kakashi', he had the reputation of '10 Second Kakashi'. It was not a name with a good reputation as it garnered a lot of laughter for many reasons.

All thanks to one Uzumaki Naruto.

"Now Kakashi, Naruto did pass your exam, and get the bells." said the Sandaime with a straight face.

"He almost killed me!"

The Sandaime was trying very hard not to laugh, "I seem to remember a paper with your signature on it saying that your students had to come at you with the intent to kill. Specifically, 'I, Hatake Kakashi, hereby release from responsibility Uchiha Sasuke, Haruno Sakura, and Uzumaki Naruto of any responsibility in case of my injury or death due to my order of them attacking me with the intent to kill.'"

"I didn't think they'd actually be able to do it. They're genin! I also want to know what sort of jutsu or weapon that...brat used! It should be restricted as a class S technique!" Kakashi grumbled in a low hiss.

Sarutobi was having an increasingly difficult time hiding his laughter. "Then what was your test supposed to do?"

Kakashi frowned. Even the Hokage was laughing at him since he well knew what the bell test was supposed to do. "Find out if they can be a team."

"Then you would pass them, or at least the ones who performed teamwork?"

Kakashi hesitated. From the sounds of it at least two of them acted as a team. Given Naruto had taken him out in the beginning, and that he had lost conscience, that meant that Sasuke and Sakura had probably ganged up on the brat and taken the bells from him. "I would be willing. You will have to find a replacement for the one who failed, however."

"I'm sure that's something we can work out. Now, will you accept the team?" Sarutobi asked.

Kakashi grinned. He was going to get what he wanted, and away from Uzumaki Naruto, the menace who tried to kill him. "Yes, of course."

Sarutobi nodded, and laughed. "Then your team consists of Uzumaki Naruto. I will find two genin to take the place of Haruno Sakura and Uchiha Sasuke."

Kakashi's mouth was now hanging open. "How..."

"It's simple. Given the note Naruto delivered to me, I decided to watch your test myself. When you were injured, Naruto tried to get the other two to help you. Sasuke only wanted the bells and Sakura was only cheering for Sasuke to win. In disgust Naruto tossed the bells to them and created Kage Bunshin to make a litter to bring you to the hospital. In other words, the other two acted like spiteful children, Sasuke for himself and Sakura not even trying while someone was dying in front of them. You owe your life to the team of Uzumaki Naruto and his Kage Bunshin, who acted in concert like a well oiled engine."

Kakashi just lay there stunned, then looked at the Hokage. His most recent worst nightmare just came true, and from the sounds of it, his team would vary from one person to however many Kage Bunshin the brat could create. Unconsciously he took a deep breath.

A few seconds later, a scream of "NOOOOOOOO!!!!!" could be heard from at least six blocks away.


	3. Getting to know you

Kakashi was, for the first time in his life, earlier than three hours late. There was a reason for this, of course. Using a loophole, he was going to get two genin, and they had better pass or it wouldn't be pretty for the two of them.

---

Earlier in the day...

There is an old saying, commonly brandied about by older generations, that goes like this: 'It was the little things that make life interesting.'

That's one of the reasons that no one could say 'It's another boring day in Konoha, and nothing new is happening.'

Or it could be that the rumour mill was working it's way into a frenzy.

Either way, two young people were entering the academy to a vast audience, (To them, an audience of just over a hundred was vast. Not due to the number of people, but the fact that they thought they would never see the academy again just a few days ago. Then again, no one had expected these two to come back as they were pinning their hopes on 'The Uchiha'.), and it was not a good feeling.

The reason that Sasuke and Sakura were back at the academy was simple. Their idiot partner had so injured their jonin sensei that they now had to wait for him to heal, or at least have a new one assigned. Fortunately for them Naruto gave them the bells, which was the reason he had been dropped from the program.

Or so they believed.

This was something that Iruka-sensei soon disabused them of, much to the Angry Chagrin of Sakura, and the clenched jaws of Sasuke. "What do you mean we've got to go through the academy again? We passed the test! Naruto was the one who failed!"

Iruka blinked, "Umm, who told you Naruto failed? I was informed by the Hokage that due to unusual circumstances, he passed while the two of you failed?"

"It's obvious!" Sakura stated while holding up something, "We got the bells and Naruto didn't!"

Iruka stifled a laugh, "Ah. Well, I'm sorry to inform you but Naruto has been confirmed as a genin, while the two of you failed completely."

Sasuke came up with the only reason that he could think of for Naruto to be the only one who passed. "How did that Dobe learn that jutsu?"

"Dobe?" Iruka asked looking puzzled, "I don't know who you mean?"

"Naruto! The 'Dead Last' of the class. How did he learn to do whatever it was he did to take down a jonin?" Sasuke stated seemingly calm, his eyes giving away his severe irritation.

Iruka's eyebrows raised and he rubbed the scar on top of his nose, "I'm sorry to disappoint you, but Naruto was not the dead last of the class. If he wanted to, he could have passed the course three years ago."

Sakura blinked, "That...that..idiot could have passed the class? Then why didn't he pass on the day of the exam?!"

"I can't answer that, Sakura, It's classified. And if Naruto didn't pass, then why was he able to be on your team?" Iruka smiled.

Sasuke snorted, "I thought it was just to provide someone to balance the team."

'Yeah! No way that idiot could be better than Sasuke', Sakura screamed to herself, however, there was still the matter of how Naruto passed. 'Then where was he on the exams? I know Sasuke was rookie of the year, and I was the best in all the tests."

Iruka looked at his two students in wonder, "Do you really believe that?"

"Of course, we compared marks during the year." Sakura replied. Unspoken, of course, was the fact that Sasuke never participated in the comparison of marks, and also left unsaid, and very forgotten, was the fact that Naruto never participated in them either. Sakura, of course, didn't let little things like details get in the way of her rose coloured world.

"Then you didn't really look at the marks carefully. I can't tell you who was the top in both areas, but I can tell you that neither of you is where you thought you were."

At this, Sasuke started to grind his teeth. There was someone more powerful than him, better than him, which meant that he had to find out how in order to take care of matters that were important. Before he had a chance to ask a question, or have his original question answered, the door to the classroom slammed open.

"Kakashi-sensei?!" Sakura shouted in surprise.

Iruka looked amused at the jonin, "Is there something I can do for you Kakashi-sensei?"

Having a good idea of what the smirk was about, Kakashi replied. "I'm here to give these two one more chance to become genin. The test was over too fast for these two to do anything but fail."

Iruka's look of askance said it all, but he also said it out loud, "I thought they failed because they didn't know or take in what we've been subtly training them in."

Iruka then looked at the two potentials in front of him frowning slightly, "Then again, given their information gathering abilities, and sheer arrogance, it's no wonder they failed themselves."

Kakashi had to stop this fast, before the two attacked Iruka and failed again. "None the less, they will be given a second, and final, chance."

Here he looked at the two, leaking a bit of killing intent as he had enough time to think of what they had done. True, Naruto had almost killed him, (Well, knocked him out due to shock as painful pebbles, while not going far into his skin, hit too many points in the front of his body as well as one...delicate...organ.), but these two were willing to leave him there to die while they fought for the bells. "If you don't pass, I will recommend that you be dropped from the program completely. I have no time for supposed genin who are so full of themselves that they cannot pass a simple exam. Konoha does not need you so badly that we can't maintain high standards."

He then led the two of them out of the classroom.

"Those two will be very surprised if they ever find out that Naruto was both the best in all tests as well as rookie of the year. Then again, the two of them weren't even able to figure it out from the very unsubtle hint I gave them." Iruka mumbled to himself. He pitied Naruto if the two of them passed. They would hold his favourite student back.

---

"Why did we fail the exam, Kakashi-sensei?" Sakura asked the jonin she and Sasuke were following.

Kakashi silently berated himself for being talked into trying to teach a genin team again. Hadn't they figured out why he didn't accept a team yet? He stopped and turned to look at the two kids. "You've had several days to think about what happened, and you don't know why yet? Maybe we should forget the test and take you to the Hokage to ensure that you're taken out of the academy and the program entirely."

Sakura gulped, she didn't think that asking a question like that was pushing him that hard, "N-no Sensei!! We'll figure it out."

Sasuke looked at Sakura, and then at Kakashi. It was at this point he realized that he knew little of one of his potential teammates. "What can you tell us about Naruto?"

Kakashi raised his one visible eyebrow, "Why are you interested in Naruto?"

"Yeah, why are you interested in the braggart?" Sakura asked.

Sasuke snorted at Sakura's answer to his question, "He passed. He also became a genin without passing a test in class, and how he passed is classified. What do we really know about him?"

Kakashi's visible eye became almost like a smile. He hadn't expected either of them to actually think, and had been considering fudging the test, if only to have someone to keep him sane, but this could work out if he changed the exam a little. That, and there were several questions that he had that Naruto's official file that the Hokage had given him missed. There were a lot of blacked out areas and lines, and activities, except for the "D" mission category, were classified. "Good answer. However, there is not much I can tell you that isn't classified. All I can say is that he's lived alone most of his life, has no known parents, and has been going in and out of the Hokage's tower on his own since he was four. I can, unofficially, say that he has already completed at least one mission. Your test will be to find out as much as you can about Naruto and his life. I doubt you'll be able to get his file, but if you can give me general information on his life since the age of 4, lets say three pages of information per year, then you will pass. You'll find me at the site of your last test when you're done. Oh, and you also have six hours to find all this information and report it back to me, neatly written out."

He teleported out leaving two stunned students behind.

"He never answered the question!" Sakura raged.


	4. Seeing underneath the underneath

Sasuke was somewhat disgusted when he looked at the pad of paper containing what the two of them happened to gather on Naruto. 

There wasn't a lot to show for three hours of work, and they had to find out more. Their possible sensei wanted three pages per year about Naruto's life, which would be a report of more than 20 pages, and they had less than one page. Even worse, it had less information on it than was believable.

Sakura had taken the lead and listed what they knew of him.

He wanted to be Hokage, liked ramen, was an acknowledged prankster, didn't like to read, had the worst fashion sense in Konoha and somehow passed and became a genin despite failing publicly.

For spending several years with him, they were surprised at how little they knew about the 'Prince of Pranks', a name that he had received from the military police. It turned out they were embarrassed that none of their forces had been able to catch him since he was around six. There was actually a special code or 'Naruto Alert' when it came to his pranks and it was usually three or four squads that were sent after him. There was actually a large bonus for the one to catch the 'Prince of Pranks', which had never been collected. It was surprising to them to learn that the only ones who happened to catch Naruto were Iruka-Sensei and the Hokage himself.

It showed a side of Naruto that they hadn't seen or known. At the time, Naruto was an academy student. That he was skilled enough to evade capture by various members of Konoha's Ninja forces, including military police, chunin, jonin, and ANBU seemed wrong to them, especially with how he acted in class. Something was really wrong with that.

They found out his birthday, which was October 10th, the day of the Kyuubi Festival, and they also found out that he was hated enough that various villagers had tried to kill him. Now Naruto was annoying, but he wasn't that annoying. The scars on his cheeks, however, which looked liked whiskers, probably set off some drunks during those celebrations who were looking to do some violence. There were people like that all over the place.

But if they added what Iruka gave them, then Naruto was smarter than he appeared, which means that he hid what he was.

Why?

"Where next, Sasuke-kun?" asked the pink-haired fan girl next to him.

"Hokage tower. Kakashi said he's been in and out of there since he was four and has already completed one mission, even if it was unofficial. This means that Naruto has access to several places within the tower that we don't. We need to find out what and where." Sasuke answered as he started off down the street.

"Um...Sasuke-kun? Have you been anywhere else in the tower except for the small area they showed us in the academy?" Sakura asked.

"No. And that's why I know that Naruto has more access than we do. He's been going in and out of the tower, and one of the two people who can catch him is the Hokage. Don't you find it a little suspicious that the Hokage himself would take time out to find and capture a prankster? Everyone knows when he pulls a prank, since he doesn't keep it a secret, so why chase him when they could find him at home? Even better, why would the Hokage take time out to help catch him? It doesn't make a lot of sense having the best ninja in the village chase down an academy student."

Sakura blinked and looked towards the tower. That, as much as it hurt, made a surprising amount of sense.

---

The secretary blinked at the two genin in front of her. "You want to see Uzumaki-san?"

"If it isn't too much trouble." Sakura replied, a bit nervous at this rather obvious tactic.

The secretary shrugged. It wasn't that big a secret that Naruto was in and out of here to see the Hokage often. In fact, the Hokage had given Naruto a small office of his own when he was younger, just to keep him out of trouble. It kept the boy busy and it also gave him someplace to sleep at times. Still, it was a first for someone to come and actually try to find him here. "I haven't seen him, but you can check his office. It's on the top floor next to the Hokage's."

Sasuke had to clench Sakura's hand to stop her from making any exclamations.

"Thank you." Sakura said in response while keeping the fact that her hand was now aching quiet. She managed to tear her hand away when they got into the stairwell.

"What did you do that for?" Sakura asked Sasuke while pouting.

"Since when does an academy student or a genin have an office that is next to the Hokage's?" Sasuke asked, now wondering if Naruto was part of ANBU, like his brother had been. "Either we're being sent on a wild goose chase, or nothing is adding up. From the secretaries reaction, she was surprised to see us ask for him, but knew about his office. To have an office, and to be surprised that someone comes to visit? That isn't something that's normal."

Sakura frowned and nodded, "Also, Kakashi implied that Naruto has had this office since he was four. That doesn't make sense at all, so it may just be a way for us to determine if the information we're gathering is the right information."

"Exactly." Sasuke said as they continued up the stairs, "We're going to check the office, and if possible, break in, but I don't think there will be a lot of information that actually pertains to Naruto there, and if there is, and if Kakashi actually knows about Naruto, then why did he fail to stop an attack by Naruto. He would have been prepared for it."

Naruto was turning out to be more of a mystery than they thought.

---

They managed to find the office, and Sasuke proved his skill with lock picks. In the office was the usual, desk, chair, sofa, a bookshelf with numerous volumes with a lot of information ranging from foreign texts to mechanical diagrams, to architecture and science books of all types. A random search of the books showed that they had small notes in the margins that didn't make sense, such as types of clay when the book was about ships, or metals when the book was about fishing. Whoever's office this was, the person was either a ditz or a genius. They couldn't tell as of yet.

The office had a small private washroom attached, and there wasn't anything in there that could tell them much.

The desk, however, was slightly different.

First was the computer. Now computers were known, and used in Konoha, but the one on the desk was clearly far above what a civilian could afford or get. First, it was very compact and folded together, second, it was on, expecting to be used. This was not what they were expecting. Nor were they expecting all sorts of files on them and their classmates that had notes on what they did, how they reacted, or even changes in habits. Naruto, not surprisingly, was not listed, and this was more of an indication that the office was a set up and a false lead.

This seemed confirmed when the desk drawers only contained papers, pencils, and assorted office stuff. No paper files and no prank equipment. Not even personal touches.

It was definitely a setup.

Oh, how wrong they were.

---

In the end, they ended up with three and a half pages of notes, and a once line comment on the false lead concerning the office. The report contained all they could find out about him during class, the information they gathered, and the information sources. They also included all sorts of speculation about their day and the information they were handed just to make it longer and ended up with around 7 pages. Of course, all the information had to be false, or planted for them to find.

In all, they decided that there first set of impressions about Naruto were probably correct. He was the dobe and the entire scene with Iruka was just to see if they could gather information. After all, hearing about how he ate Ramen at Ichiraku's, and the amount he could put away in one meal, the information had to be false. No one had that large a stomach.  
Kakashi read the report, told them they passed, and that they would meet at a bridge nearby the day after tomorrow.

Kakashi had a lot to think about, some favors to pull in, and an office to raid. He also had to visit the chemist and get headache medicines and elixirs to aid against ulcers. He had a feeling he was going to need them.


	5. Following a fox

It had been a month so far.

A month that to Kakashi, almost defined hell on Earth.

Given the failure of the two idiots, he had been forced to do teamwork exercises and other incidentals instead of missions. Not that is was bad to do so, but he had wanted to get as many D ranks out of the way as possible so that he could get back to the higher paying missions. At the moment, however, that was impossible.

Pinky and Sulker were the definition of dead ninja in training.

Sakura was a fan girl. At the moment she didn't concentrate on anything to do with training, and more on raising Sasuke's already overlarge ego and trying to put down Naruto. If she didn't get it into her head soon that in a real mission she would be useless or dead, he was going to request that she be dropped from field duty and assigned to someplace like an out of the way office where he'd never have to see her again.

Sasuke was a pain to teach rather than the genius he was supposed to be. He really didn't care much for his team and only wanted to know the most destructive techniques possible. While good in someways, he was disregarding the basics necessary to be a successful shinobi. Worse, he acted like he was owed this due to his name alone, not to any actual work put in. If not for the unusual circumstances surrounding the test, Kakashi would have dismissed this as his imagination. If the brat survived even six to eight months, he'd be ready to sweep a lobby, if he could even do that correctly.

The true surprise had been Naruto.

When Kakashi got the team, he was given several documents on each of the students, including psych, physical, known techniques, bloodlines, etc. One of the most significant ones was the student report on Naruto by various teachers. With the exception of Iruka, all the teachers had stated that the boy was a slacker and an idiot, who didn't deserve to be a shinobi of the leaf. Given the discrepancy between the teachers of the previous years and Iruka, he was speculating that either the teachers could not see what they had in front of them, or that the only training that was given to any of the students had been at home.

The previous teachers did praise Sakura and Sasuke highly after all.

Still, Naruto did not match up with any of the reports.

"OK, that's enough for the day. Meet at the bridge tomorrow." Kakashi said as he disappeared into thin air.

The difference was the reason that Kakashi was now going to take some time and follow the kid for the day and see his routine.

Now in the previous month, he had confirmed and visited Naruto's office, which had very complete yet sanitized information on almost everyone in the academy. The books were an eclectic thing, without any real common factors. From ancient books that were hard to read because of the condition and faded writing, to text books on things that made absolutely no sense for a shinobi, it seemed that Naruto delved into anything he could get his hands on.

Why have a book on the mating habits of various types of worms next to a treatise on various tobacco's was something that merited a visit to the White House, especially with the nonsensical notes in the margins. Who actually wanted a wine of distilled tobacco leaves? That would taste horrible. Or the relationship between wolves and worms. It was as if the boy was a schizophrenic.

Still, there was more going on than the two idiots realized. If they had just taken a look at some of the stuff in the journals, they would have realized that Naruto had a lot of plans, such as that weapon he used. They also didn't find a cache of computer chips with locked videos, probably surveillance of some kind. Either Naruto was in ANBU, which he had already ruled out, or the Hokage was just too kind.

He followed Naruto to a lunch stand, and used a radio to listen in on the bug he planted earlier.

"Hey Ayame neechan! How are you today?"

"Fine Naruto-kun. Your usual?"

"Not today."

A snort was heard. "Naruto not eating his usual? I'll have to close the stand."

"Come on Teuchi! I want twice my usual order!

There was a pause, "I don't know if I have that much prepared."

"Well, whatever you have, and keep them coming. I missed breakfast."

Kakashi was treated to the site of his most unusual student eating what had to be his body weight in noodles. Where did the kid put the stuff? The only other person he knew that liked noodles that much was the Yondaime, and even he didn't eat more than a bowl or two at a time.

He continued to follow the kid when he went into the tower, where he was apparently meeting with the Hokage.

"Well Naruto, how are thing today."

"Ah, could be better. The emo's still all huffy, and Sakura is getting to be more stupid by the day."

Kakashi winced at the next statement "They must have learned to be a team by now."

"Dream on! Ego boy thinks he's team by himself, and he needs to be knocked down a wall before we'll see him even consider, condescendingly, his team. He'll want them to get a bottle of water and a towel, since he is the oh so amazing Uchia."

"Maybe a new sensei would work."

"Nah, not Kakashi's fault. You can't make them learn if they don't want to."

"What do you suggest then?"

"A mission. C rank or better."

"Naruto, your team hasn't even completed a D rank yet. They're not ready.

"Yeah, but we need to have something that appeals to the ego and his fangirl, can be put past the council, and will show them that this isn't a game."

"Ok. I'll have your team here tomorrow to get a mission. You want to tell him?"

"Yeah, I think I've strung him along for enough time. Yo! Kakashi, get your butt in here and pick up your bug."

Kakashi grimaced.

* * *

And so, they were off to Wave escorting an old drunk.

He had let the genin handle the first obstacle, observing what they were doing.

Sakura barely got in front of the client. She was expecting Sasuke to save them all.

Sasuke managed to pin the chain, but was about to get killed.

Naruto yawned and pointed his hands at the two opponents.

Knowing what was coming, Kakashi said a prayer for the two.

Except, it wasn't the explosion and rocks that came out of the tubes underneath his hands.

He had expected that.

What came out this time were thin wires connected to senbon. And when they connected, the Demon Brothers screamed and shook as if in unbearable agony.

It also went on for a full minute before it stopped.

It looked like another weapon he had to request be added to the S class list.

When had Naruto gotten this cruel?


	6. Would you look in the water

Kakashi had seen a lot of things in ANBU before he decided to retire and become a regular Jonin again. Assassination missions, information gathering, disgusting habits, the whole bit. He honestly did not think that he could be surprised anymore.

Unfortunately for him, he had to pass a Genin team.

Currently, he had a very angry avenger, who did not want to get to know his team mates, and jealous of one of them. Supporting this unthinking soul was his fangirl who was looking at the third member of the team as though he was a demon of some kind. The third member was acting bored and calmly tying up the two Chunin who had managed to get fried.

He really did not want to know where Naruto had learned a lightning technique, or how he got the senbon to fly so fast.

As of now, he was talking to the client and learning about the situation in Wave that was clearly far outside the requested mission. It was a situation that made itself, and had a businessman trying to become something more by destroying the moral of an entire country. Apparently, even the Daimyo of Wave didn't know that if he had just made a request with the right information Konoha would have been more than willing to provide assistance for a future consideration.

It's what made Fire Country so powerful militarily. By assisting others, and not calling in the marker immediately, Konoha used this to gather something more important than money. A reputation for being nice and powerful political connections that they could use to up trade, which was the real life blood of the country.

And just as clearly, having powerful 'heroes' who protect the people is also good for business.

"Just what is that kid?" asked a confused, flustered, and slightly scared Tazuna, especially since he had insulted the kid earlier.

Putting together what he knew of Naruto, he replied, "The most surprising ninja in the world. I wouldn't worry about it too much. Now, I need to talk with my team. It may be better for you to stay here for a bit."

Tazuna gulped as he noticed the Jonin looked at the spiky blond haired one, "Right. No going near them for now."

As he approached the trio, he thought of how to phrase the question. It was, after all, a team decision to go on even though his initial thought was to head straight back to Konoha. Too bad he never got a chance to voice that thought.

"We're going on." Sasuke grunted.

Kakashi raised an eyebrow in a voiceless challenge.

Sasuke snorted, "If the Dobe could handle this, then there isn't much of a challenge."

Sakura nodded in agreement. "Two supposed ninja being taken down by one move? They obviously don't have what it takes."

Naruto yawned, "It's better than D ranks. Besides, I want to stretch my muscles a bit."

Kakashi sighed. It was three against one.

--

It was the clash with Zabuza that allowed Kakashi to learn more about his most dangerous student.

After he was captured, Naruto got this huge grin and started to feel himself along his forearms. He was up to something, and that wouldn't be good. Considering the fact that he was next to the target...

"Zabuza, could you please kill me?"

Zabuza turned his head to Kakashi, his face showing surprise. "I wouldn't think you'd be like that, given Konoha's reputation."

He turned his attention back to the Genin. "How pathetic. Do you really think you could beat me? You and your friends aren't even worth of the title ninja. You're all nothing but snot nose little brats."

Naruto smirked more as he saw the new water clones gathered, "Sasuke, Sakura, protect Tazuna. I've got a meeting to go to."

With that, Naruto made one hand sign and over a hundred clones appeared.

Zabuza laughed, "Do you think clones could help you now?"

Naruto's only reply was, "These clones can."

The clones started towards Zabuza water clones and quickly took care of all but one, leaving an impressed Zabuza, "So Kakashi, it looks like you have a prodigy on your team after all."

Kakashi's mumbled reply to that was, "Couldn't you have killed me before he does something worse?"

Naruto grinned, "You like water clones, don't you?"

"What of it brat?"

"Just this," and with those words, Naruto raised one hand and a soft 'fwut' was heard as suddenly the remaining clone blew up and caught on fire.

"I have the ability to set water on fire. Care to see what happens when I apply it to your body?"

Zabuza gulped suddenly, knowing what Kakashi was talking about now. "How about I let your sensei go. I think I have to leave the area.

--

As Zabuza and Haku were running through the the trees he contemplated the blond gaki. If there was a new jutsu that Konoha had that could set water on fire, perhaps he could learn it, and end some injustice. "Haku, when we get back to base, we are going to kill Gato, grab any valuables, and then drain his bank accounts."

"Zabuza sama?"

"Kid, you saw what happened. If we give half the money to wave, and then keep the rest with us while throwing ourselves on the mercy of Konoha, we may end up happy. If not, we do not want to confront the Firewater Ninja again. He's too dangerous."

Haku nodded and followed her leader.

--

Kakashi looked at the glass dart with silver lining that Naruto handed him to look at. At first, he had let it drop to the ground, afraid that whatever it was would blow up on him, like before. Fortunately, nothing happened. The dart was probably the carrier for whatever that jutsu was.

Naruto was grinning as Kakashi looked at the fake dart. There was nothing on it or in it to find and the new launchers worked great. Now, how to deal with that outraged and jealous look on Sasuke's face.


	7. What have we learned?

Work on the bridge proceeded apace, and the genin on team seven had worked their way up to water walking. The entire village had turned out in force to help and to watch the completion of their hopes and dreams. Another boring day, it seemed, since the encounter with Zabuza.

It was only two days after that encounter that a gift had been left on the bridge, along with cases of money and other valuables, such as food, clothes, and medicine. The gift had been a note and the unconscious body of Gato, who had been put to death the next day the same way that he had killed their hero before. The note was simple. An apology for any thing that happened when Zabuza was under Gato's command and a present from him given that he had learned from the rat's mouth what he had done to the country. While Zabuza wanted to kill him, it would have been too fast, and the people of Wave had the right of vengeance.

Sasuke's anger at the note was extreme, as was the way Kakashi and Sakura were looking at Naruto.

For Sasuke, it was the fact that while he could not do anything, Naruto had tricks up his sleeve that could scare off a high ranked missing nin. From what he had seen so far, it was Naruto's weapons that were what gave him that advantage and surprise, so he resolved that he was going to get copies from the weapon makers back home. Failing that, he would steal them, or at least some of them, when they got back to Konoha, as well as any instructions that came with them.

No way had the Dobe made them himself, and they were obviously a gift, probably from the Hokage.

Sakura, on the other hand, was wondering just WHO Naruto was to the village. This little adventure had shown that she did not know her team mate well, and going over everything she had learned in the past month or so, who had sponsored him to the Academy. She now knew that Naruto had very high level contacts in the village, which included the Hokage, and that her sensei was always wary of the blond, but she hadn't really considered the extent of the training the blond had.

When she had confronted Kakashi on it, the man sighed and pulled his head out of his book. "Sakura, remember that report I had you and Sasuke do for me in finding out about your team mate?"

Sakura nodded, "Yes Kakashi sensei. None of it made sense at the time. It still doesn't. Why would Naruto have an office in the tower, or even be able to down more in a meal than Choji, without showing it?"

Kakashi let out a small chuckle, "Well, Naruto is a bit different. No, that isn't right, he is a lot different. That actually was his office you got into, and you failed to look and read any of his books or papers. I have also witnessed him eating enough bowls of ramen to fill a bathtub in one sitting. I don't understand that myself, but I figure that either he has an unusually high metabolism, or that he is converting it almost immediately into chakra. Given the high amount of Chakra that he has, I would say it's the second one."

"A high amount of chakra? Him? You have to be kidding, Kakashi-sensei." Sakura said in surprise.

Kakashi sighed, "You have seen the amount of clones that he can create."

"Yes."

"Well, one of those clones is the equivalent of around five hundred of the clones thought in the academy." Kakashi answered, and then waited for her to figure it out.

Sakura spun to look at Naruto who was practicing water walking around the completed sections of the bridge. She had seen the number of clones that Naruto had been able to make, and didn't look a bit exhausted, "He has that amount of chakra?"

Kakashi snorted, thinking to himself, 'he has more chakra than I do, and I'm an elite jounin.'

Sakura's brain was almost shorting out at the answers her brain was providing. "But with that capacity, why didn't he pass the academy in his first year?"

"Did you learn about tree climbing or water walking in the academy?" Kakashi asked.

"No sensei"

"So, how do you figure Naruto knew enough to control and maintain what is comparable to a straw amount of chakra when he has the pressure of a fire hose behind his?"

"So that was why he couldn't do a normal clone." Sakura muttered to herself, "It also explains the techniques he uses. We don't have the capacity to do them, but he doesn't have the control to do the ones we can do easily."

Kakashi nodded at the girl finally using her brain, "Exactly. And the academy is being really slack in what they are teaching these days, so I am going to have to talk with them when I get back. He should have been learning control from a very young age, but they completely missed it. Now, what else have you learned, aside from that?"

Sakura thought about everything that had happened so far, including all of the exercises they had done before coming on this mission, "That teamwork is needed to succeed. While one person may be good in one thing, the other wouldn't be able to do it, or be very bad at it. Naruto can do higher level techniques, for instance, while he can't do the ones I and Sasuke can do easily. In the opposite direction, the skills Sasuke and I have are not suited to a lot of missions of a higher level while his are good for that."

Kakashi was now smiling behind his mask. Perhaps Naruto's idea of trial by fire had merit after all, "What else did you learn?"

After a few minutes Sakura responded, "That we all have work to do. I to become stronger and raise the amount of chakra I have, Sasuke needs to learn how to work with others and consider their skills, and Naruto to learn the basics. That still doesn't explain why Naruto has an office in the tower."

Kakashi shrugged, "He isn't in ANBU, and from what I was able to find out, it was originally his playroom."

Sakura blinked and then started to wonder exactly who he was. A normal child wouldn't have a playroom in the tower, which meant that he was the son of a very high ranking ninja, or that he had a clan that no one knew about. Sasuke was an orphan, as was Naruto, but Sasuke didn't have that sort of advantage, which meant that Naruto was protected at a higher level. Who were Naruto's parents?

* * *

At the gates of Konoha, two people were approaching.

The guards were bored, and they tended to slack off a bit. This was what got them gate duty in the first place. When the two arrived, he asked, "Name and passport."

The man snorted, "Momochi Zabuza, formerly the Demon of the Bloody Mist, currently listed as a missing nin and applying to Konoha to become a ninja here with my apprentice."

The two guards blinked, "Uh...One of us will get someone to meet with you. Would you mind filling out the paperwork we have here in the meantime?"

Zabuza shrugged. Anything to get him in and for him to start learning what was going on here. The guards hadn't impressed him as being on a level with that genin they had encountered, then again, these chunin were probably not anywhere near being good enough to form an elite squad put together with the infamous Sharigan Kakashi.

* * *

Tazuna was smiling as the last stone was put into place. A couple of days to dry, and the bridge would be ready for operation. "That's it."

People cheered. For the first time in a long time, their village was home again. With the bridge, they would no longer be confined to the vagaries of shipping owners, and the bridge would also increase trade. And they had Tazuna to thank.

Tazuna, however, was thinking of something else. The young man that he hadn't thought too much of when they had left Konoha had been the reason for the success of the trip. In fact, the boy was pretty much the only one who had done anything, especially if the note they had received was something to go by.

It was humbling.

Inari was sort of happy now. He still missed his father, but he was now starting to recover, especially as he had watched the entire spectacle of Gato being put to death for his crimes. The entire time, he stared with his eyes dead until Gato finally expired. It would take time for the boy to fully recover, but he wanted the boy to have a hero to look up to, someone to emulate, and a true reason to live.

Tazuna looked at the blond who was smiling at the people of Wave with something akin to a weight off his shoulder. That boy wasn't loud, he didn't brag about much, and he was happy for others. It was obvious now that the boy wasn't the stereotypical ninja who fought only for pay. The boy was a hero that fought for the good of others.

Perhaps, just perhaps.

He would need to talk with Inari tonight before the team from Konoha left. There was a story to tell, and a decision to be made. In a way, it would be Inari who would make a decision to be a bystander, or make his life a battle cry of a hero.

* * *

The interrogator and his witnesses now had the statements of Zabuza and were questioning him as to why he wanted to join Konoha. "So it was a genin being powerful that made you decide to join us?"

"Yeah," Grunted the swordsman, "His skills and techniques are powerful, and he could become a rallying cry to help free the Mist from a tyrant."

One of the witnesses, a member of the council, smiled, "So Sasuke Uchia convinced you to join us. That's good to know."

"Yeah, the blond prodigy was too powerful for me to challenge. Compared to that kid, Kakashi was kind of tame."

The man choked, "Blond kid? Sasuke has black hair."

Zabuza laughed, "Him? The was shaking in his boots in fear. The blond is the one who scared me with setting water on fire."

The witness looked at the team composition once again, before answering in a very disappointed and disgruntled voice. Why couldn't it have been the Uchia? "That blond kid is Uzumaki Naruto. He was the dead last of his class."

* * *

Tazuna looked at the team as they were about to leave. "Kakashi-san, if I may impose on you, I would like to ask a favour."

"What is it?" Kakashi asked with a raised eyebrow.

"My grandson, Inari, would like to go back with you to become a ninja. Would you be willing to escort him and my daughter to Konoha so that he may enroll in your academy?" Tazuna asked, "I will pay for the extra mission as well as any cost associated with his schooling."

Kakashi's eyebrow raised, "Well, I don't mind, but why?"

Tazuna looked at the blond who was saying good bye to some of the kids. "You have a hero on your team. A person who cares for others, and I would like Inari to learn that. If he is to become a ninja, then I want him to learn from a place that teaches real values instead of how just to kill."

Kakashi nodded at this, and soon the party of five left for Konoha, leaving the soon to be named, Great Naruto Bridge behind as a memory of a hero.


	8. Home again, home again

The trip back to Konoha was a quiet one, with Kakashi pondering what to do with his team.

In a way, the trip had been good, as at least one of his charges had grown up.

That, however, was topped by the crazy one and the quiet grumbling one.

Now, some of the Ninja in Konoha had the idea that Sasuke was the crazy one, what with his stated intentions of getting enough power to kill his brother, especially at such a young age. While they didn't mind him working for what he would get, Sasuke really pissed off a lot of the older generation with the idea that he deserved them putting down everything and giving it to him because he was the last of his clan. While he may technically be a genius because of his bloodline, unless he worked at it he was considered to be a lazy ass.

Naruto, who many would consider as a grumbling numskull was another thing all together. His way of surprising people, especially Kakashi, was something to be put down upon, and that was because they considered him to be under trained. His pranks and ability to hide from even ANBU was taken by the population of Konoha to be an anomaly that was created because of the Hokage having a 'hands off' policy regarding any punishment.

Kakashi had reversed this idea in his own head.

Naruto had some tricks, and having had some time, was calming down about it. But the devices, especially one that could burn water were, to be honest, scary.

Sasuke was just power hungry in comparison.

But what really made Kakashi want to rush back to Konoha was Naruto's statement, "You know, there are some kids I'm teaching, and you'd fit right in. I'll introduce you and teach you some of my more infamous jutsu's with them."

* * *

There was a meeting taking place in the Hokage's office, consisting of the Sandaime, Homura, Koharu, and Hiashi. They were a bit worried about the future, and what could be done, as well as the reputation that Naruto had unknowingly accomplished. It wasn't that they wished the boy any harm, it was more because he was supposed to be a hidden ace.

"So," the Third said as he pulled on his pipe, "Naruto was able to convince a missing nin and his apprentice to join our ranks. That should be a good thing."

"Unfortunately, it seems Sasuke is not living up to expectations, and if Naruto gains more of a reputation, he may become a target." Homura stated.

"That is a concern," Hiashi said calmly, "But in a way it is good that he is gaining a reputation fast. It would put him in a position where Danzo would be unable to contest his rise."

Homura frowned. Although they hadn't been able to prove it, Danzo was considered the prime suspect for the elimination of the Uchia clan. A lot of support that the clan had went over to Danzo after the incident, and they had to be careful in how to handle the one eyed coot. "The problem is if Naruto becomes too famous, too fast, then Danzo will be looking at ways to ensure that he isn't a factor. Something that we don't need."

"I'm more interested in the report that the boy has discovered a way to burn water. Can you imagine the number of strategies that could be applied if this is true?" Koharu responded.

Hiashi looked at the Hokage, "Did you teach him that technique?"

The third chuckled, "No, but it may be something he created. Naruto has been building a few thing lately since he hasn't been able to gain fine control of his Chakra as of yet."

"But the lessons I've been giving him.."

"Do not add up to the fact that Naruto still can't form a simple clone. He simply wastes too much chakra to the environment because of the amount he has, so fine control is out. Since normal techniques are out, and his ability to generate chakra seems to be growing by the day, another form of chakra control will need to be devised." Sarutobi sighed.

"Getting back on topic," Homura stated strongly, "The idea was to get Sasuke to calm down and see what is with the real world while Naruto hung in the background. That this Gato fouled things up so much that a C rank became an A rank is tasking. We may now have two genin too worried to be able to assign any tasks other than a D rank for a while, and Naruto's abilities may be bandied about before we're ready. The population may take it as though it is the Kyubi that is the cause of both situations."

Sarutobi nodded, "All we can do for now is wait and see. I will have them all meet with a mind healer as soon as they get back and we will go through the report.

* * *

Team 7's arrival back in Konoha was quiet, although Sakura and Sasuke learned the hard way what writing mission reports was all about. Of course, the debriefing session that occurred may have had something to do with that as the person doing so kept going back over the details of the two short fights. Having to rewrite the reports several times because of forgotten details made the two of them swear to start keeping a scroll on them to write on as soon as they were in safe areas.

Tsuname and Inari were welcomed and had quickly been assigned an apartment as well as appointments made so that the young boy could be tested, both to see where he was and what he had to learn and be tutored in. He had also been assigned to a councilor in order for him to discuss the happenings in his life the past little while. While the boy would get enough training to survive with, as all Konoha's citizens did, his going on to a mission team in future depended on a clean bill of mental health.

Naruto, as soon as he got into his office, groaned. There on top of his desk was a set of paperwork that had piled up while he was away. Damn it! Why did the old man have to do this to him?

Making sure to jam the door, Naruto formed several shadow clones to do the paperwork while he started a new project. His hidden draft table came free from the wall, and he pulled some papers from out from his bookshelf. The futon powered system worked well, but he needed the projectiles to fly faster.

That book on magnetism had given him a few ideas, now to put them down on paper so that he could create his new firing mechanism.


	9. A Lazy Day Around Town

The day wasn't going that well. At least that was the opinion of Uchia Sasuke, Shinobi of Konoha, and the most deserving person in the country. At least in his own, humble, opinion.

For the past two days, since they arrived back, he had been going to various blacksmiths and suppliers in hopes of finding a copy of Naruto's equipment. The closest he had found, thus far, was a senbon thrower that didn't have the speed, or the options, that he had seen. In the end, he described what he wanted the weapon to do, and was told that they didn't see how it could be done without the shinobi having special abilities, like lightning jutsu. He was informed, however, that if he could supply such a weapon, or even find a broken one, then he would get a large finders fee.

This was not what he wanted to hear.

Since that avenue was a bust, he would need to go with his other option. That of stealing the equipment and instructions from Naruto. Luckily, Sasuke knew just where he lived.

* * *

Sakura was taking some time to think about things. So far, what she observed of herself was not something she liked, and she had even less reason to be happy about the mission than the others. For one thing, she was completely unprepared for the mission, and was wondering why it had been assigned in the first place. The only two on her team that were prepared were Kakashi sensei and Naruto, much to her chagrin.

This meant two things, practice and studying physical skills, so she went to the one person she knew could help her, or at least try to. "Ino, I need your help."

Ino looked at Sakura a bit suspiciously, "I'm not helping you get Sasuke."

Sakura blushed and then mumbled, "It isn't about Sasuke."

Ino was curious by nature, and what was in front of her was a partial mystery. "What is it then?"

"I need someone to train with, to make me better," Sakura said in a stronger voice.

Ino looked at Sakura, and expression of confusion on her face. "What brought this on?"

Sakura looked sternly at her friend, "When Naruto is able to defeat and scare an A-class missing nin known as the Demon of the Mist, as well as defeat two Chunin who were working with him, I've got a lot to do to catch up."

Ino's response was natural, "Naruto did what!?!"

* * *

"Hokage-sama, you can't be serious!" Kakashi protested as he stood in front of the village leader, "Whatever the hell he is using or doing is dangerous, more to my team than the enemies! What happens if he loses control of that water burning technique?"

The Hokage smirked and took a slow drag on his pipe, allowing the slightly cooled smoke to stimulate his taste buds and the smoke to slowly trickle into his nose. He looked at the distressed ninja in front of him once again and almost laughed out loud, but instead decided to answer the man, "Kakashi, I know exactly what he is doing, and he will not lose control of his techniques and weapons. Actually, I'm happy to have someone doing some innovation."

"Innovation! He lightnings enemies with senbon, burns water, has that damn loud rock thrower, and who knows what else. Combined with his ability with the shadow clone, he's closer to a one man army!"

Sarutobi coughed, covering his laugh, "Yes, and I find that a good thing. You do know that I consider him a possibility for taking over after me."

Kakashi's knees gave out and he sat down suddenly, "Hokage-sama, please tell me you're joking."

The old man pulled his hat down low so that the man across from him couldn't see his eyes, "Naruto has not revealed his abilities as of yet. What you've seen so far is only the bottom end of the scale. I'm sure that you realize that there is more that he can, and will, do."

Kakashi was at the point where he was willing to hit his head against the desk, or a wall, which ever would knock that thought out of his mind. "What do you mean?"

"You've been out of ANBU for a while now. Perhaps you should go catch up, and talk with some of the police members, especially about escapes, traps, hidden areas, and so on. To give you a hint, did you know that Naruto, by himself, could well have killed over nine tenths of our forces if he was serious about his pranks? Or the fact that he's shown us so many holes in our security? I pay him for his pranks, it's one of his ongoing missions."

Kakashi's eyes narrowed at that, remembering one prank that had ruined his book with paint. "You! You are the cause of his pranks! Since when are pranks ongoing missions?!"

"Since it shows how lax our people are." the old man said with a smile and a puff of smoke. "I would prefer that you don't inform them of these missions, I don't want to ruin any surprises, and the people I have writing the after action reports are some of the happiest in Konoha."

* * *

Within a few hours, the rumour mill was full of information on Naruto, not scaring missing nin, but having enough power to overpower an entire country by himself. Of course, the rumours were out of control, having gotten to the civilian populations and...enhanced...beyond recognition. It was so exaggerated that Tsuname didn't recognize it when it got to her and her, "He saved another country? How many does that make so far?" caused even more rumours to circulate. This was enhanced when it was revealed that her country, Wave, was saved because he had done a few techniques which were almost unbelievable. Of course, she was only repeating what her father said, and he was drunk at the time.

The rumours naturally got to several organizations, including the Academy, ANBU, ROOT, and a few others.

They had several reactions depending on where and when the rumour was spread.

At the Academy, Naruto's former teacher, Iruka, was worried about his adoptive little brother and canceled classes early so that he could get to him and see if he was all right.

Konohamaru and his two friends were in awe of their older friend and teacher. They were exclaiming loudly on this and hoping that their 'Boss' would teach them what he did so that they could become heroes as well. This caused a mass exodus of rugrats going in a group to find the 'Boss'.

In ANBU headquarters, several of the members shivered. They had experienced Naruto's pranks, and were worried about what Kakashi was teaching the boy. If the boy was able to call lightning from the sky, and breath out fire hot enough to get water to ignite, then they got off lucky. Perhaps it was time to investigate just who the brats parents were, just for their own peace of mind.

In ROOT, there was just a man crumpling the paper containing the rumours. He now knew why Sarutobi kept Naruto away from him and his forces. The old man had his own weapon which could go against his own forces at any time. Well, the Hokage wouldn't win the race. He might have won the first few battles, but Danzo would get even better weapons to yield against anything Sarutobi could throw at him. He just needed time, and perhaps a few meetings with the boy.

Ino's words and shouts, and rushing around to tell everybody she knew the latest news certainly got things going.

* * *

Naruto was sitting down as he considered his new plans. While on paper, it was good, they just wouldn't work. Whatever was placed inside just stuck to the side. The question now was where to get more books on physics, as the ones that he had were basic ones, and were not something that was really well studied in Konoha. Now where would he need to go, or send to, to get the books he needed?

Sighing he removed the failed arm launchers and replaced them with his normal ones, and then went to find a quiet place to practice.

At least he came up with a new type of weapon load, and the new glass darts had a burnable gel with a small amount of sodium and water so when it cracked open, it would stick and continue burning. Rubbing the gel would only spread it around, and it would continue to burn even with normal fire preventative measures. It was time to test them out, and there was a good target range not to far away from his apartment.

* * *

Sasuke came into Naruto's place and saw his targets. The armbands that he had seen Naruto with were on the desk as were the plans and instructions. This would be the perfect thing, and since Naruto used it so easily, it was going to be simple to operate. The fool was indulged by the Hokage too much, and so all he would have to do would be to read the instructions. He wouldn't even use them until the next mission, and Naruto would see that he wasn't unique. Weapons like this were only useful in his hands, not those of a dobe.

* * *

When the kids, ANBU, and ROOT agents found Naruto practicing, they were watching as he set fire to several targets from over a hundred metres. The kids were in awe, the ANBU agents were wincing, and the ROOT agent was just writing the results of the boys practice.

When the rugrats came out and started to ask Naruto to teach them, the reply had the ANBU agents rushing back to headquarters to prepare for a siege.

Naruto was going to teach them how to play pranks.


	10. Kakashi's Day

Kakashi was not in a good mood.

No, make that worse. He was in a mood so bad, it could be considered good that he hadn't taken every weapon he had access to and killed half of Konoha by now.

And it all started with a visit to ANBU headquarters.

* * *

"What the hell are you teaching that kid?" asked one of the ANBU captains. "I mean taking care of one country is something, which I will attribute to luck, but to free two countries in a short time?"

Kakashi raised the eyebrow on his visible eye, "What are you talking about?"

Anko grunted as she looked at the one eyed bastard. "We looked up the last mission you were on, and decided to send someone quick to see what happened in Wave. How the hell did Naruto become a hero there and get a fucking big bridge named after him?"

"Oh. That. Could we not mention it? I would like to forget that mission." Kakashi stated with a grimace that could be seen through his mask.

The people around the table were looking at the man in front of them. A mission that Kakashi had rather forget? It had to be worse than he made out, and probably understated in his report. Snorting, Anko decided to continue. "Well, lets see. According to Zabuza, he can set water on fire."

"Zabuza? Who ran into him?" Kakashi said with a tiny drop of sweat running down his forehead.

"He's joined Konoha, because of the kid. Now what have you been teaching them?"

Kakashi sighed, "How to walk up trees. Teamwork, strategy, ambush techniques, endurance, and some hand to hand."

The table boggled, and Tenzo shook his head, "I can't believe that's all you taught them Taisho. I mean, we're on alert now because of Naruto starting to teach."

Kakashi coughed up water into his mask that no one had seen him take. "WHAT! You've got to stop him before he creates a set of monsters!"

Immediately upon finishing this he stood up, and was going to rush out of the room when Yugao stopped him with a hand on his shoulder. "He's teaching them how to play pranks, and what do you mean, making them monsters?"

Kakashi groaned and sat back down, then explained about Naruto's weapons, and his being able to form Kage Bunshin. He also explained what the Hokage said to him in the office. Sitting back, he enjoyed the slightly stunned expressions that were on various faces.

Anko's eyes rose. Then she frowned. And finally laughed. "Well, that explains what our observers saw yesterday. According to them, he was practicing with targets and kept setting them on fire. Do you think he'd make one of those for me?"

Now everyone was interested. If Naruto had a new type of weapon, and if they could convince him, then perhaps they could do with an update of their equipment. It was at least worth a thought, and Anko was going to go see the brat in his office as soon as she got the chance. Not that she would tell the others until it was done. Strangely, or perhaps not so strangely, the others were also planning to see 'Hokage Junior' as well.

Ibiki nodded slightly and then grumbled, "Maybe I should ask him to come in and give me a hand in interrogation some time. He might have a few things he needs to test out."

Kakashi just shivered at the thought.  


* * *

That had been the first visit of the day, and talking with the rest of the Jounin in charge of the rookies was not much fun either.  


* * *

"So I hear you have a budding genius on your team, Kakashi." Asuma said as he tossed back a drink.

"Sasuke, from what I've seen is not a genius." Kakashi stated flatly. "In fact, I would say that he's only been getting everyone to think so based on his name."

Asuma laughed, "He wasn't the genius I was talking about. Hell, everyone is talking about how Naruto saved at least two countries, one of them on a mission with you."

Kakashi mused on this for a few seconds, having heard the same thing from ANBU earlier. It must have been one of those classified missions that were blacked out in Naruto's file. "I guess so. How much do you know about Naruto."

Asuma frowned, "Only what my dad's told me, and the scrapbook showing some pictures of Naruto's pranks. One of the pictures I enjoyed was the aftermath of the 'Rain of Pies' that came from the Hokage mountain."

Kakashi remembered that day clearly. entire paths leading up to the top of the mountain had been booby trapped with everything from grease to tar and feathers. When people finally got up there a good half hour later, all they had found were automatically resetting catapults that were on swivels with a loader for all the cream pies that had been coming down. They never knew who had done it before, but now that the Hokage told him about the B ranks, and given Naruto's ingenuity with devices, it made sense. "ANBU still don't know who did it, you know. And they can't figure out how that equipment got up there either. They were well set into the ground."

Asuma laughed, "Yeah, don't you wish for the days of whoopee cushions?"

"Why are you interested in him anyway?"

Asuma chuckled. "With Ino spreading what Naruto's been doing, Shikamaru wants to have a match with him."

Kakashi raised an eyebrow, "He's challenging him to a fight? Is the boy crazy?"

Asuma was striving to keep his laughter from breaking out. "No, he wants to have a few games of Shogi with him."  


* * *

"Kurenai, can I speak with you for a moment?"

Kurenai looked up from the paperwork she was doing, "Certainly Kakashi-san."

"What do you know about Naruto?" he asked.

"Uzumaki Naruto-san? He has blond hair, blue eyes, has S-class secrets about him, is a prankster, has tactically sound planning given all his pranks, is an infiltration and stealth specialist given his clothes, can move silently, high endurance, can sense and avoid weapons and other objects, knows Konoha like no one else given his escapes, can hide at a drop of the hat, has at least one specialized genjutsu that can distract and somehow knock out most males even though they know it's fake, is admired by the younger generation, and has at least one girl who loves him, but is too shy to talk with him. He has an office in the Hokage tower, which was originally his playroom, is mechanically inclined, can strategize, is studious, and has written a few papers on possible uses for high level ninjutsu. He has the Kage Bunshin, knows how to deploy a team, has rescued at least two countries, is responsible for raising up our own security, and can teach at a drop of the hat." Kurenai answered. "And that is just the start of what I know about Uzumaki Naruto-san."

"If you know all that, then why aren't you his sensei?", Kakashi boggled, 'Hell I didn't even know half of that.'

"I only learned it after the teams were formed, Kakashi-san. And I will not tell you who told me. It was held in confidence. However, I will tell you a few things that you should know, if you will help me set up Naruto-san on a date with Hinata-san."

"Hyuga Hinata?" Kakashi asked, having remembered the name of the girl from that first day.

"Yes. She is the one who has the crush on Naruto, and is too shy to approach him. She has a tendency to faint around him."

Kakashi sighed, "I'll see what I can do. Do you have any hints for me at least before I do this?"

Kurenai nodded slightly, "I would recommend that you look at some of the councils papers from several years ago. The agreement you find may surprise you."  


* * *

The only person left to visit was Gai. Something he was trying to avoid.

Seeing him, Kakashi was going to try a new tactic. "Gai, would you like to help me 'fan the flames of youth' in one of my gennin?"

He was going to gargle with a lot of mouthwash after this.

"Yosh! I would be happy to do so!" Gai shouted.

"Great. I have a student named Uzumaki Naruto who could use a few pointers on how to fight." Oh this would be great revenge on the orange wearing maniac.

"Wonderful! When I meet with him in the morning for our usual training session, I will ask what he will like to learn more about!"

Kakashi stood like a stone statue while Gai continued on his way walking on his hands.


	11. Getting back to normal

"So, we have a mission?" Naruto asked.

Kakashi resisted the urge to roll his eyes, "Yes, we are going to be doing a simple 'D' rank mission."

Sasuke snorted, "Why? We've already proved we can handle higher level missions."

Sakura stared at Sasuke, wondering what inhuman place he had been born in. "Sasuke, we've never done a 'D' rank before. And the one mission that we were on, well, we were lucky."

Sasuke snorted again, "All that was needed was the Dobe, it's not like it was a serious situation."

Kakashi was gritting his teeth. The sheer arrogance of the kid was getting to him, and there was a sore need for physical attitude adjustment. That would have been frowned on, however, but perhaps he could turn this around. Maybe if he requested the most dreaded 'D' then it would turn the kid around. "Well then, this mission shouldn't take that long then. In fact, since Naruto was the only one needed in our last, and ONLY mission, then maybe we should excuse him from this one?"

Sasuke smiled. This was his chance to prove to everyone that Naruto wasn't that great, and that the only thing going for him was those wrist bands, and since he had them now, well, this mission would be over in minutes, whatever it was. "Agreed."

Kakashi lightly grabbed Naruto's shoulder, "Well, I am afraid we won't need you today, Naruto. Maybe you should go do some studying."

Naruto frowned at the older man, "We're supposed to be a team. What the hell are you trying?"

Kakashi made a mudra that only Naruto could see from the angle they were at, "Well, I understand that some people want to talk with you about buying some stuff.

Seeing the sign, Naruto started to giggle inside, but he kept his eyes narrowed, "But I want to train!"

Kakashi sighed as he noticed the countersign Naruto used, "I suppose I could send you to Anko."

Naruto froze, "You wouldn't."

"Yep! Maybe training with her for a few days would..."

"Bye Kakashi, good luck with your mission!" Naruto's voice trailed off as he seemingly ran away.

Sakura looked at Naruto's dust trail and was wondering what was so bad about this Anko person.

Sasuke smirked. It would be a good day. A simple mission and no dobe in sight, what could be better. Well, getting rid of Sakura, who was also a dead weight would be good, but one miracle a day was enough to ask for. Tomorrow he'd get rid of her as well. Then Kakashi could devote all his time to training him to get stronger.

* * *

Sarutobi looked at Naruto, "Kakashi actually requested that D Rank?"

Naruto shrugged, "Yeah. No idea why. You told me it's usually used to do tracking practice."

The Sandaime Hokage nodded, "Yes, and with no less than 3 people. I wonder what the poor boy is thinking."

"What?"

The Hokage puffed his pipe a bit, "He almost had a breakdown yesterday, or he might have had a small one. People aren't sure. It's certain his mind blanked out for a while at least."

"They guy's usually late, not blanking out." Naruto said in puzzlement.

"They found him just standing stiff as a board, and it took half an hour to get him to do more than breathe. I do understand he was talking with a number of people, however. One of the results of which is on your desk."

"OI! You mean he's caused me paperwork!" Naruto said, clearly annoyed.

"Just a few requests from ANBU. If Kakashi knew about them, perhaps that's why he excused you from training, they may have some special requests or something." Sarutobi said with a hidden smile.

Naruto got up and went to the door, "It figures. Just when I thought I figured out how to reduce it, he makes the pile larger."

Sarutobi looked to Naruto and asked before he closed the door, "Wait, you found a way to reduce paperwork?"

Naruto shrugged, and said just before he closed the door. "Bunshins have to be good for something other than training or gathering intelligence."

Sarutobi sighed to himself, "Unfortunately, not many have your chakra threshold. I doubt it would help with the number of requests I have each hour. Especially since I already use about 20."

* * *

Anko smiled as she walked into Naruto's office. She had never been in it before, and only saw the kid in passing, but there was something with him sitting on the couch reading reports that seemed familiar. Ah well, it didn't really matter so much. "Hiya kid!"

Naruto looked up and groaned, "Kakashi sent you after me, didn't he?"

"Naw, well, in a way as he told a few of us about your inventions." Anko shrugged as she sat down across from him.

Naruto snorted a laugh. "That's why I have requests for weapons on my desk? I'm not the armourer, I'm just a gennin and student."

Anko started to raise fingers as she went through each point, "And an inventor, a menace with pranks, leader of the rugrat patrol, hero of at least two countries, the most orange ninja in the world, and Hokage in training. Face it kid, it would have crossed your desk sooner or later."

Naruto leaned back, "Yeah, I guess. So what sort of weapon do you want me to release from the armoury?"

"Well, What I really want is a copy of your weapons." Anko smiled. A nasty and wicked smile.

Naruto sat up straight, "Nothing doing! They're still too experimental."

Anko looked at him with pleading eyes, "Awe, Come On! They're great! And I could report to you anything wrong, or test them out, or help make them, or something!"

Naruto rubbed his forehead, "How good are you with seals?"

Anko was taken aback by the question, "Somewhat good. I can seal stuff, and know a few other things such as explosive seals and so on."

Naruto groaned, then took off one of his armbands to show her. "These things are some mechanical work, but mostly a fusion of dozens of different types of delicate seals in a matrix.

He turned it over and showed her the inside. "First, each one of these particular seals needs to be matched up to the person. Without it matching, then they will misfire easily, and you need to be able to control the output of chakra from the various points under them. For instance, one point loads the tube from the storage seal, another point is the trigger mechanism for the futon seal, another point is the power gathering point, and yet another is for targeting information."

He turned it back over, "Inside the tube are futon seals, which have to act in a certain pattern to push the senbon, or any article out of it at a high speed. To hit things properly, you need to have a sort of pulse to let you know that you're going to hit what you're aiming at, and that has to reflect off of what you're aiming at, so it has to respond to different environments, situations, and materials, which also means you need to practice so that you can feel the response it gives you."

Naruto then pointed to several tubes near the rear, "Each of these tubes are different types of loads, depending on the situation. Only three at a time, because of space, can be next to the launch tube at any time. So far, I've come up with six different loads. Plain senbon, wired senbon to send a raiton jutsu through, a firebomb, a distraction bomb, which I found can be used to bluff people, a smoke bomb, and a solid pellet which I got from what I did to Kakashi a while back. As you can see, the whole thing is really a piece of sealing, more than a weapon. And you can also see why it's experimental."

Anko whistled at all that had gone into the thing, "Yeah, well, I still want one."

Naruto groaned, "Ok, on two conditions."

Anko had a maddening smile on now. "What?"

"First, you are going to help make the weapon loads, and help with doing all of the seal work. Then you're going to tell me what me being the hero of several countries is about."

"DEAL!" Anko shouted in delight.

Somehow Naruto just knew this was a great mistake in the making.

* * *

"I'm going to kill that cat." Sasuke mumbled to himself.

He really didn't like this cat. Not only was it escaping everytime it was trapped, but it also seemed to know how to fight, as were evidenced by his scratched up arms. Someone had to have trained that thing to know how to hit the most painful nerves.

Sakura looked over at Sasuke, "It's just an innocent animal, Sasuke."

Sasuke's response was to growl, and then he saw the thing sitting quietly in a clearing. This was it, the perfect revenge, and fire would do it. He raised his arms and triggered the mechanism. Nothing happened.

Growling he triggered it again. Nothing except the sound of glass breaking. He tried it a third time and heard more glass breaking and then was wondering why his arms felt warm. Soon he was trying to pull the damn armbands off as fast as possible as the things were burning on his arms, the metal was hot, and whatever that was that was coming out of the tube was liquid fire. Literally.

Sakura started to scream and then took one of her kunai and started to try and cut the things off of Sasukes arms, much to the devastation of his skin.

Kakashi sighed as he rushed Sasuke to the hospital, leaving the burning armbands on the ground behind them.

Why did he have to have a team which had such an idiot on it? Just because someone else came up with a weapon, this one thought he could recreate it. What had he done wrong? Who had he pissed off?

No, Naruto was bad enough, but Sasuke? Sasuke would definitely be the death of him.


	12. Work with me, won't you

"I want a new team."

Normally, the person saying this was young, usually a genin who had a minor disagreement with another on the team. It was rare a person was transferred off the team unless a major issue had come up. Usually it only took a half hour to let the genin vent and rave to the person in charge, or to the Hokage, if it got that far, before they went willingly back to the team. They were dealing with pre-teens to teenagers after all, and despite their supposedly adult status, the teams had falling outs all the time until they really became adults.

However, the person in front of the Hokage was not a genin. "Kakashi, you approved the team. They are yours to train until they at least become Chunin."

Kakashi started to rub above his eye. "Right now, I have only one person who can be trained. Sasuke is out for at least a week while they repair his arms, and Naruto is more dangerous than a troop of nins. And the one who can be trained, Sakura, is physically just barely confining to standards for her age. She has little to no Chakra to speak of, and need more physical workouts than I am able to come up with, aside from stamina training, jutsu training, increasing her capacity, strength, and who knows what else. In fact, I'm more afraid of these three killing me than anything else!"

The Hokage leaned back into his chair, "I'm sure you're exaggerating."

His one visible eye was twitching, "Lets take a look at that. Naruto and his inventions are dangerous, not to enemies, that a given, but to his allies. From what I've seen he's literally a walking bomb. Sasuke can't let anyone be better than him, so he goes and tries to create his own weapons that shoot fire and he was willing to kill a pet cat in order to prove that his weapons were ready to use. Sakura? If she is scared for her team mate, instead of thinking about what is best to do, she's willing to kill them to cure them. Does that sound like a team that will make it in the long run to you?"

"Naruto's devices are perfectly safe, although experimental. In fact, anything he takes into the field is quite well tested before it is used in difficult situations. Those armbands that you are complaining about have been in development for more than two years." the Hokage said as he stuffed his pipe. It seemed that this may be a two bowl meeting.

"I notice that you're not saying anything about Sasuke or Sakura." Kakashi stated as he watched the old man light his pipe.

"What is there to say? You have an arrogant, 'I Can Do Anything', spoiled brat and a fangirl. There's not much I can do about that since you passed them, unless they have an extreme mental condition. Besides, do you want to see the Uchiha being praised more for anything that he does by the civilians, or do you want him to be trained properly?"

Kakashi winced, "I would prefer them to be trained so that they are an actual team, but to do that I really need to bring Sasuke's ego down, and nothing I've done so far have been effective."

"Then you will have to find something else. Perhaps some cross training with another team since we do not have enough jonin available to be sensei at the moment." The Hokage said as he puffed slowly. "Maybe show them a few truths about the life they have entered. Take them around to a few non critical departments, such as the hospital, minor interrogation, search and rescue operations. That and get them a course in how to write reports and have them attend a couple of debriefings of minor matters to show them what is expected in their reports."

Kakashi gave up and did the one thing that he wasn't expecting to do.

On his knees, Kakashi started pleading with the Hokage to let him get a new team or transfer the three of his genin to some post far away.

When the Hokage saw the tears, he decided it would be a three bowl meeting with some drinking thrown in.

* * *

Sakura ended up with a busy week. In fact, during that week, Kakashi was on time, every time. It was something that she didn't want to experience again.

It was with a mad grin that she greeted her two erstwhile team mates.

"Hey Sakura-chan, how are you?" Naruto said with a smile.

With half crazed eyes, the girl in question started to laugh.

With Sasuke down, and Naruto assigned to do something else, Kakashi had been pushing her from morning to evening in order to increase her chakra capacity. Running up and down trees, walking and then running and fighting across water, and Gods, the exercises involved were slowly driving her insane. It was with a mad grin that she greeted her two erstwhile team mates.

She would get them for the torture, yes she would!

The crazed laughter grew louder and more crazed by the second.

The two males just started to take a few steps back, Naruto gulping, and Sasuke remembering how she could wield a kunai.

"Dobe."

"Yeah teme?"

"Want to start running that way, and I'll go this way?"

It was at that moment Kakashi decided to show up. "Well, now that we are together again, there are some lessons we need to go through before we take a mission today."

Naruto and Sasuke just looked at him as he ignored the laugh Sakura was giving, and her sadistic grin and crazed glow in her eyes now that she calmed down.

"You need to learn about the various departments that run in a Ninja village, so for that, we will start with the bane of everything, the debriefing department."

And with that, the team left, the two boys looking cautiously at their female team mate.

* * *

At the end of the day, Naruto gestured for Sasuke to follow him. When the two of them were out of site, all Naruto said was, "Don't do it again."

"What do you mean?" Sasuke grunted, still holding a grudge against the dead last.

"I haven't reported you, so you don't have to worry about that. What happened should be more than enough punishment to prevent you from stealing from a fellow leaf nin again. Just don't do it. If you want something, put it in writing and ask, and people in the know will inform you if it is a good idea and why, unless it compromises security."

Sasuke scoffed as he started to walk away, "As if they would refuse me."

Naruto grabbed his shoulder and turned him around, "They would have in this case. If you didn't know, what you stole were defective weapons, one more likely to cause injury to the user instead of to the target. More than that, you wouldn't have been able to use it unless you've had at least two or three months training. I expect the blueprints returned by tomorrows meeting, or you WILL be reported."

And with that, Naruto walked off.

Sasuke just stood their fuming. That the dead last was telling him off, and would have a good reason for reporting him was just icing on the cake. He would find some way to get that power for his own, if for no other reason than to deprive the dead last of it. Naruto would see that he should submit to his superior then.

* * *

A week later, during which time they had visited various areas of concern, and two genins were exposed to hairy eyebrows, Anko showed up in Naruto's office.

During their collaboration, the two had got to talking, and at that moment, he was at his drafting table creating a new, over sized version of his armbands to be placed in various areas around the village and brackets for the walls. The things would need testing, but they were not as testy as his arm units were, so they could be made faster, and in bulk. The problem was keeping them from being stolen, so designing hidden explosive seals to prevent them from being taken from the village were also being made part of the design.

Anko ignored this and placed a paper right down in front of him, "Hey brat. I came up with a new load for that weapon of yours."

Naruto raised an eyebrow and turned to her, "I am drafting at the moment. Couldn't it wait a minute?"

"Naw. I was thinking about how medics were, and some of the things we use in interrogation, and was thinking, what if you have a better delivery system for some drugs?"

"Delivery system?"

Anko just pointed out the paper. "Yeah, as you can see, it can be used for certain situation where a person can't get near."

"How are you doing making the current loads?"

"Almost done. I just want to create a few of these for testing."

Naruto looked over the quickly drawn plans and raised an eyebrow. This did have possibilities. "Let me draft out a new version so we have a proper plan to follow and we'll do it."

Anko grinned. The new loads were going to do a lot for capturing those that they needed, and she had the perfect first test target after they got them to fly right. Besides she would then be able to take photos of him without the mask.

* * *

Kakashi shuddered. For some reason he felt as though someone had stepped on something very important to him. Looking up, he said, "You hate me, don't you?"


	13. Time to prepare

In many way, Konoha was a microcosm of the bigger picture of the Elemental Nations, if not the world.

You had the ordinary people who didn't really think too much of the situations around them, preferring to go day by day and making a living out of whatever skills they had. They didn't put too much effort into doing things, but they didn't put in too little either. Just the ordinary person you would find anywhere who would defer to authority while complaining about what that authority was doing.

You had the dedicated people, who put themselves into a position of being the best at whatever they did. It did not matter if it was only one endeavour, they poured their heart and soul into it, allowing some advancements, while many more were collaborative efforts. These were the innovators who's names may or may not be known, but, for a time at least, their efforts led to a better, or worse, future.

You had those who were power hungry. Some for physical battles, some for political power, while most were for money. They thought that everything revolved around what they wanted, rather than around what was best for the group. These greedy people were the ones that instigated incidents to either push things their way, or to tear down those who could prove themselves better.

You had the peaceful ones. The ones dreaming of a better future where things like wars didn't happen. They were the dreamers and adventurers who wanted to see the world, and bring knowledge to the masses. Unfortunately, most of these people had trouble seeing anything beyond five or six hundred metres, and would prefer to do their exploring by books. These people got their jollies by creating complex rituals, such as the tea ceremony, in order to impose order upon a chaotic universe.

You had the leaders, who encompassed all of that, but who were looking out for others as well. You couldn't lead if you didn't have somebody to lead, so they ended up teachers, bureaucrats, and using others for the most gain, somethings for the community, sometimes for themselves. They were the backbone of the society.

Then you had those who would give their all, including their lives in order to protect what they considered important, be it a place, an idea, or a person. These were the ones who would cross all lines of society, and more often than not compromised everything but their beliefs to carry out what they considered the most important thing in the world.

If you were to place Kakashi somewhere in this mess of definitions, you would get different answers.

He would place himself as a person who would give his life for another.

Most of Konoha's ninja force would put him as a lazy bastard that just did the bare minimum.

Some would put him as a leader of men.

Those that knew of the Sharingan, would consider him an innovator as well as one of the best.

Sasuke considered him an annoyance who wouldn't share his power.

Women considered him a pervert who shouldn't be near children.

But most of all, Anko considered him her first target.

* * *

"You sure these will work?" Anko asked as she looked over the new loads that she had developed with Naruto.

"They should. I would never have thought of doing it that way, and the design of this dart is so new that I wonder if it would get a longer distance," Naruto replied as he finished the last seal.

The dart that they were looking at duplicated an arrow that Anko had found in a book. Instead of the usual fletching, this one would cause it to spin, giving a longer distance. If it worked with the dart, the range would change from a mere 100 metres to somewhere around 800. In addition to this, it had a wind seal at the bottom, which would further propel the dart once it left the launching chamber. Something that Naruto hadn't even considered.

"The real question is if the load will come out once it hits it target," Naruto muttered, wondering if the new seal would work.

"Well, I have a load of the new types, its time to test them," Anko smiled to a boy who had fast become a friend. She picked up the final dart, sealed it with the others into the loader, and attached it to her left armlet. The other darts to test were loaded into the right one.

"Well have fun, I guess. Just tell me if they work, and then tell me what you loaded into them." Naruto shrugged as he went back to his drawing board.

Anko was already out the door as her reply came, "You'll find out very soon."

* * *

Sasuke smiled.

Currently, he was looking at all the equipment that he managed to gather from all over the compound, along with the various pieces of equipment that he bought from very grateful merchants. Steel, fuel, various electronic components, televisions, computers with monitors, and numerous chemicals with all the appropriate chemical paraphernalia. It had taken almost a month, but he had everything complete and moved into place. Now he could begin making weapons better than Narutos!

He turned on the computers, and waited. Computers, from what he had seen and understood, were simple things. You talked to them, they talked to you, you told them what to do, they did what you wanted. "Computer, I want information on creating weapons."

Unfortunately for Sasuke, the equation he was depending on, which was computers did everything you asked them to do, was the realm of science fiction. He didn't know this, or realize what computers could really do, or what they actually were. As a Shinobi, he didn't require the machines for information, to work his body, or even to get jutsu. Most of the Ninja world still depended on scrolls as it was tradition.

So Sasuke stood waiting for the computers to respond to his query. He was standing there for more than five minutes before he realized they weren't working right, since they were not giving him the information that he wanted. He snorted and turned away to the chemicals. Starting with that should be easy enough to do.

A simple bomb. He would start with that, and he had a book that one of the clerics was happy to give him, although apparently he wasn't supposed to know it existed. It apparently had all sorts of recipes for what he wanted to do. It had something here called thermite, and showed how to make it a solid to take with him on missions. He had all the components, now to mix it up.

* * *

It took an hour for her target to show up. She knew the new release of that book would lure him into the open. Remembering the lessons, she pointed her arms, waited, and then released the darts, one after the other.

Kakashi, who was distracted by the new book almost missed it, and did manage to get partially away, but the first dart still hit him, and he suddenly felt heavy, sticky, and couldn't see as his eyes were now closed and sealed shut. He heard, rather than felt the second object hit and nothing happened from his prospective. Except for laughter. A high pitched laugh he recognized as Anko.

Anko looked at the hair defying pervert and gasped out. "Experiment successful. I'm going to love using these!"

* * *

There had been something bothering Naruto for the month since Sasuke had stolen the defective armbands, and today was the day when it occured to him. The damn things were vulnerable to be stolen, not just by Leaf ninja, but by enemies. Or there were several solutions that he could come up with, but nothing that would work long term. Yes, he could work a blood seal, but that would not last long to someone determine to reverse engineer everything. Nor would a seal to recognize a particular chakra signature, as his own experiments had shown that it was possible to duplicate those. No, what he needed was a new way of doing things, and the only way that was possible was to get the old pervert back here.

Naruto shuddered. Every time ero-senin came back, he created problems for him. Unfortunately, the man was the only person cleared for what he was doing. Getting him to stay out of the hotsprings and concentrating on work was going to be hell.

* * *

'Tarred. And feathered.'

Kakashi was making his way to ANBU headquarters with these thoughts.

'Tarred. And Feathered.'

He had a feeling it was due to Naruto, but there was only one person who would do it in this manner, since this wasn't part of a huge prank.

Walking in the door, he greeted the person at the front, "Where's Anko?"

The masked person hesitated for a second, "She's supposed to be at the tower today. Can I ask?"

"No. You may not. I will be in the dock area. No one is to come by. IS. THAT. UNDERSTOOD!"

"Yes sir. No one is to disturb you while you are in the dock area. There's just one thing."

"NOT. A. WORD!" Kakashi shouted as the poor sod who was now a poor substitute for Anko.

The man gulped, and sat back down. It was five minutes later when he heard the screem. "I tried to tell him we were out of kerosine, but was he willing to listen? No, He's a former ANBU Captain and knows better than those on desk duty."

* * *

Sasuke eyed the finished product.

The powdered thermite worked as advertised. It burned hot, and it could melt through metal.

This solid version should work as well, but it still needed to be tested. He wasn't fool enough to test it himself after the last disaster. He needed a fool, a patsy, someone who would use the stuff without thinking. Someone who would do things just because he said so.

That left the Dobe out.

But there was Sakura. Then again, she was scary at the moment. More likely to kill you to save you, or just to get some attention. She was out.

Kakashi seemed to want to cry every time he looked at the squad members. Given the mans experience with the Dobe's stuff, he was out.

But there was a resource outside of his team. A resource that would finally be useful. And the best part was if they died, it would be no loss.

Finally, Sasuke had a use for fangirls!


End file.
